1. Hair trimmings/nail clippings
You never thought you were supposed to recycle organic body material, did you? Well you thought very wrong, and your misconception has cost God’s green Earth dearly. Start recycling your nail clippings and hair trimmings immediately, or our beautiful planet will suffer from dire consequences.
World-renowned pianist and President of the NOAA, Glen Furbington announced Monday morning, “If we don’t stop throwing our nail clippings and body hair in the trash, God will have us all killed by 2020.”
Next time you shave your legs, arms, head, balls, shaft, frenulum, vulva, labia minora and/or labia majora, fupa, belly, chest, neck, face, butt, or knuckles, keep Mother Nature in mind!
This, of course, does not apply to back hair! The only correct method of disposal for hair from your back is burning it. Upon combusting, your trampstache actually promotes photosynthesis, and helps rebuild and restore the O-Zone layer.
2 & 3. Scissors and pasta sauce
Would you believe that 99% of scissors used today were made out of 100% recycled pasta sauce? Well, you better believe it, and you better start recycling your scissors and uneaten pasta sauce!
Strong Guys With Good Pets 